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Posts Tagged ‘When Seafood Attacks’

Guy N. Smith – Origin Of The Crabs

Posted by demonik on June 30, 2009

Guy N. Smith – Origin Of The Crabs (New English Library, 1979)


Rouse suddenly let out a piercing scream releasing him from the paralysis of sheer terror in which those malevolent red eyes had held him. In panic he turned and tried to scramble up the slippery rockface. But his feet could not grip; slowly he began sliding back down, ever closer to the nightmarish form that was rapidly approaching, its huge claws waving in the air, its powerful jaws opening and closing in anticipation.

Thanks to Killercrab for the cover scan and blurb

See also the Origin Of The Crabs thread on Vault Of Evil

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Guy N. Smith – Crab’s Moon

Posted by demonik on May 16, 2009

Guy N. Smith – Crab’s Moon (New English Library, April 1984)


An armoured underwater army, they lay off-shore, watching, waiting. Then, moon-driven, coldly mad in their need to destroy, to kill, to eat, they edged forward.

The quiet night sounds: gentle waves lapping and hissing on the shingle, the warm on-shore breeze ruffling through the grassy dunes, lights, laughter and music from the unsuspecting holiday camp, the diesel thump, thump of a last, late fishing boat.

Tensed, shuddering and eager in their hunger, they lurched out of the water. In their hundreds, huge and evil, they crawled, lumbered up the beach, feeling their way towards their prey.

The new night sounds. the clicking of giant claws, the scraping of ‘giant bodies across the rocks, screams of terror, screams of agony suddenly stilled, the crunch of bones, the sickening sucking and munching as they gorged on human flesh.

The crabs had invaded once more ….

In the summer of 1976 the giant crabs first attacked mankind on the Welsh coast. Part of that story was told in Night Of The Crabs: the remainder is told in this book -GNS

With Barmouth under threat of invasion by the Radio One Roadshow, would-be Lothario Keith Baxter decides he’d rather take his chances on Shell Island than risk exposure to the likes of Dave Lee Travis and his “verbal garbage” for “morons”. Having persuaded frustrated Irey Wall to accompany him for the afternoon with a view to a shag in the sand dunes, the muscle bound hunk gets down to some serious showing off by taking a skinny dip in the sea. He’s soon very much skinnier for the experience, too, as …. the giant crabs are back!

This is a proper Nel – I’m only on Chapter 4 but Guy’s already worked in a couple of crafty plugs for Night Of The Crabs (and Jaws: don’t tell me he wrote that too!) which augers well for the rest of the book. We’ve just lost the obligatory young lovers swimming off the island and now our crustacean chums are battling it out with the army on Shell. Meanwhile, money mad entrepreneur Miles Manning has taken some lucky Blue Ocean Holiday Camp punters out in his luxury yacht for the evening to enjoy some smoochy Engelbert Humperdink records. Something hits the bottom with the force of a torpedo ….

Crabs Moon thread on Vault of Evil

Thanks ade!

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Guy N. Smith – Night Of The Crabs

Posted by demonik on September 15, 2007

Guy N. Smith – Night Of The Crabs (Nel, July 1976)

The Welsh coast basks in summer tranquility. Then the ‘drownings’ begin.

But not until the monstrous crustaceans crawl ashore, their pincers poised for destruction, does the world understand the threat it faces.

A seafood cocktail for the strongest stomachs

“What a beautiful night”, Pat remarked ….. “If only we didn’t have to worry about giant crabs!”

Holidaymaker Pat Benson, recently dumped and divorced, has only just met ace Marine Biologist Cliff Davenport when both their worlds are thrown into turmoil by the cow-sized crustaceans. Prof. Davenport has come to Shell Island off the Welsh Coast to investigate the disappearance of his nephew Ian and his fiance Julie who went for a swim in the sea and never returned! After examining a trail of giant crab tracks in the sand he’s arrested by the military police who accuse him of spying on their new pilot-less aircraft. Fortunately, he knows Sir Ronald Bradley at Whitehall, so he’s let off with a warning and even given back his binoculars. But why were the army chaps so aggressive to begin with? Could they know more about the recent “mysterious disappearances” than they’re letting on?

The answer is a resounding “No!”

Even though the enormous King Crab and his – by comparison – half-pint cronies have selected Shell Island as their on-land home, nobody who has seen them has lived to tell the tale and the army’s surveillance equipment is obviously far from state of the art. Davenport suspects the truth and, together with Pat, keeps moonlight vigil at the spot where he saw the out-sized claw-prints. Their persistence is rewarded when they have the pleasure of watching the crabs scuttle after Bartholemew the mute beachcomber and tear him limb from limb!

Now that he’s seen them in action, Davenport puts a call through to Grisedale at Whitehall and, explaining the urgency, beseeches him to send one of his top men. Grisedale goes him one better – he loans him drunken sot Colonel Goode whose brief involvement in the story at least ups the dialogue a notch. He is a super-arrogant, natural born sceptic who everybody hates on sight and the feeling is obviously mutual. Having decided “I could do with a drink. Whisky. I’m parched”, he heads out for a night on the piss warning Davenport that he’ll be driving back to London first thing in the morning. When more bathers go missing overnight, Goode, extra-grumpy now he’s nursing a hangover, is less than sympathetic. “People want to learn to swim before they start buggering about in the water. Bring back Conscription, I say. Teach ’em all to swim!”

Meanwhile, the ease with which they’ve picked off and dismembered their victims has made the crab army so cocky that now they’re ready to declare war on mankind. In the case of the evil genius King Crab there even seems to be something personal about it. He leads his creatures out of the sea and into a bloody first raid on the base where he masterminds an easy victory, with the soldiers scattered and a tank junked! Won’t Colonel Goode feel silly when he reads about that in the newspaper!

It’s great fun, of course. The pace picks up sharply once the crabs make themselves known, and the skirmishes with the army are glorious. Tense moments when Davenport puts on his frogsuit and locates the sleeping monsters to their cave, only to realise his escape is cut off by a sentry! Two big surprises: it’s not especially violent and neither is there any gratuitous sex. There’s a minor outbreak of premarital hot knee-trembler action on P. 49, but that’s between the lead couple and after what they’ve been through who could begrudge Pat “feeling at his hardness through his trousers”?

Thanks, Jerrylad!

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Guy N. Smith – Killer Crabs

Posted by demonik on September 15, 2007

Guy N. Smith – Killer Crabs (NEL,  May 1978)

killer crabs

As the Rats found their Lair and the Slugs, their Breeding Ground, GNS’ crustaceans have found their Mangrove Swamp.
This is an odd one. The ‘lost’ Crabs book? I found a spare copy (if anyone needs one..?) and after a GNS fan on his site gave it a rave I thought I’d better get back to it. It’s a fast-paced entertaining read but somehow just misses the truly great award.

Four years on from Night Of … and we start promisingly with a prologue aboard a Scandinavian fishing vessel who land a four foot crab in their catch…the book proper kicks off in Australia at the Great Barrier Reef. Hayman Island to be precise. Home of rich person’s place to be The Royal Hayman Hotel. Also home to hunky beach bum Klin, sweaty journo Corder, pert,pouting sex mad Caroline Du Brunner (who is not all she’s made out to be), Captain Manton (who?) and Harvey Logan – the last of the big-game hunters, who’s turned up to bag a Great White – but a monster crab will do. Klin’s a fisherman, part time shark spotter and bit of rough for Ms Du Brunner who’s very interested in what’s hidden in his tatty denim shorts. He’s also seething about Japanese fish poachers, and after a close encounter with them, unites all the island fisherman and sends them out to deal with the fiendish orientals. The Japs gun down the Aussie leader and sail away laden with fish – the hapless fishermen end up in the pincers of the crabs,but, fear not, GNS equals things up by sending in more crab battalions to deal with the ecologically unsound Eastern anglers. After a break enabling Klin and Caroline to get jiggy and Professor Cliff Davenport (Huzzah!) to get called in.

The crabs mount a boffo attack on the jet-set hotel defying the might of the Australian Navy and Marines. What’s with the suitcase stuffed with money? Horny Caroline is bedding whichever male gets within five yards of her. A lucky shell from a destroyer in Barbecue Bay snuffs an unlucky nipper and Harvey Logan is claiming the credit. Prof Cliff’s worried. It’s crab spawning time and if the dirty little devils make like Ms Du Brunner there’ll be millions of the bastids. Where is that infernal Mangrove Swamp? GNS loses it towards the end but, for once in an FM review I thoroughly recommend the finale – a near as dammit ‘natural’ outcome.

A great page-turner but still the least involving of the crabs stories.

Review: Franklin Marsh

See Also Vault’s Guy N. Smith section

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Guy N. Smith – Crabs On The Rampage

Posted by demonik on September 15, 2007

Guy N. Smith – Crabs On The Rampage (Nel, 1981)

They had come back …

One man only saw them and him they killed, hunted him down through the dense reed beds, trapped him, drove him mad with terror before they pulled him to pieces and ate every bloodied shred of his body.

And then it was quiet again for a little while.

Until they came ashore again, in their hundreds, their bodies reeking with the malignant, cancerous disease that was within them. The disease that was driving them mad with pain, mad to kill, to wipe out every living thing in their path.

On that holiday beach were hundreds of men, women and children. Food.

The crabs, despite their lethal illness, are determined to go out with a bang and, for the most part, have a great time of it, scuttling about the coastline, blowing up power stations, snapping everybody in half, venturing inland – definitely approve of their destruction of the Isle of Dogs and nice to see the Blackwall Tunnel erased from the map! I was a little concerned that GNS had overlooked the all-important sequence where one of the stricken monsters is cannibalised by his colleagues but, nope, the old master doesn’t make slip-ups like that. There are some hints that it’s all the Russians’ fault and maybe the crabs have only left the seabed because there’s something worse than themselves down there.

As the-only-man-who-can-save-us, Prof. Cliff Davenport suffers from advanced charisma deficiency and doesn’t get much to do but chase around looking for dead crabs until he gets involved in a wrestling match with a living-ish specimen, and, due to (or despite?) leaving his wife at home while he does the tricky stuff in London, he doesn’t get to shag anything (though a number of victims compensate for his thoughtlessness).

See also Vault’s Guy N. Smith section

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